Being good with oneself, it’s all an art . And yet, everyone knows that it is necessary to love oneself in order to fully love others! In this article, let’s be a little selfish, it feels good.
Here are some tips to feel good about yourself 24/7, whether alone or accompanied.
Stay focused on yourself
In our society, information is ubiquitous, easy to access and can quickly confuse. The fashion of shouting on all the roofs what we do night and day makes it easy to harvest a string of judgments, criticisms, remarks or inquisitive glances. Do not think, however, that you can avoid criticism by dodging the famous blue wall: there will always be someone to put your nose in your business and make you doubt! It is therefore necessary to get away from this, to keep in mind its objectives and to know its limits. When we are deaf to the siren song, the voice of our heart is more audible. Try, you’ll see … Think about yourself and focus on your own existence and goals.
Believe in yourself and sort through the advice you are given
« You should not do this », « it’s not good for you », « you’re not like these people », « you’re better than… », « you should not say that », « You have to… », « We want you to… », « It’s better if you… »
Advices are good. But it is necessary to sort. Again: you’re not playdough! Do not step on it. Do not believe anything under the pretext that it has been repeated to you many times in your life. Parents, teachers, colleagues, friends have played a more or less important role in your life. They taught you, gave you something to improve, helped you grow, defend yourself, have fun, feel good, but no one else can claim to know what’s out there better for you. At some point in your life, you are better able to know what you need, what you want to avoid, what you want to experience, and most importantly: who you are. Do not live your life according to what others believe is ‘right’ for you. Live your life according to what is right and good for you.
« Do not believe what you judge yourself to be true after being tested by the flame of your existence. Be your own torch. » Bouddha.
Give more importance to your opinions than to those of others
Ah the tastes and colors… We are all different and it is rare that we all agree on the same subject. So, do you trust! Do not be constantly looking for the advice of others: it will make you addicted to others and / or erase your personality little by little. Live your life fully, do not live that of others in the shoes of another.
Be governed by courage, not by fear
The more your fear governs your life, the more your heart closes. You are no longer able to act with your heart, and no longer listen to the voice of your instinct. What you do is only the consequences of your fears and not your real desires and projects. Love is blocked by fear and the heaviness of your emotions, you build barriers so high that they become almost insurmountable … You have to break all these bricks and let the light and love enter your mind! You are brave, you are capable, you are the best: make the warrior within you go out!
Did you know? The word ‘fear’ has very heavy vibrations. The negative energy that we associate with it only adds weight to this little word. It is important to avoid talking, thinking, taking refuge in fear in order to raise our vibrations and to be open to the energies that elevate us.
« We lie when we are afraid » Tad Williams.
« The courage is to dominate the fear, not to not be afraid. » François Mitterrand.
See you as you are!
Photography : Duane Michals.
The distorting mirrors, it’s fun, but only 5 minutes. To be too stuck in front of the deforming ice, one will almost forget to look at it … really. What is behind your imperfections? Your fears, your disappointments and the judgment of others. Ready for spring cleaning? Put all that in the trash! See how you are; with none filter. Do not forget to take off the labels that « the others » have put on your person. Who are you, what do others believe you are, or just yourself?
« I’m not what you think I am. You are what you think I am. Your thoughts create your world, not mine. » Liam Tinker
Do not waste time with people pulling you down
Most unhappy people are surrounded by toxic people for them. Avoid the company of people who constantly criticize you, who complain about you, who judge you, who do not try to understand you, who try to restrain your personality, who put you in a box, in short, you have understood: make room for real friends in your life. And if you still have no real friends under your arm, remember that it’s better to be alone than badly accompanied!
« People tend to be generous in sharing their nonsense, fear, and ignorance, and they seem eager to feed you with their negativity, but please remember that sometimes the diet we must have is spiritual and emotional, be careful with the way you feed your mind and soul, fuel your positivity, and propel yourself into positive action. » Steve Maraboli
Know that toxic thoughts are toxic; Nothing more, nothing less!
Do not believe all the toxic thoughts that cross your mind. « I’m bad », « I still missed everything », « I’m not good enough », « No one loves me » … Replace them with their positive counterpart : « I’m not good in this area, but I excel in others », « I learned a lot from this experience », « I’m learning how to become better » , « I love myself and I love others ».
Allow yourself peace of mind and happiness. You are your own enemy, so make peace with yourself and see what you are capable of when you are free of all those bad thoughts.
Pamper your imagination
Logic is not more important than imagination. A good balance between the two is necessary for your fulfillment and your happiness! By sulking your imagination, you feel obliged to find a logic in everything that happens to you. You will lose yourself in your research and your logical explanations and will lock your heart and mind light double turn. It’s good to ask yourself questions, but you have to accept that there are no answers to everything. « Why did I live that? » « Why do I have to do that? » « How is it possible ? » If logic can not answer, imagination will fill you. By being imaginative, you will open doors that were previously unknown. A little sweetness and dream is only good everyday. Think about it …
« Imagination is more important than knowing’ Albert Einstein.
Focus on the present
Get out of the shifting sand of the past or get stuck there forever forever! What happened happened. The past is immutable, but the present can be anything you want. People who are stuck in the past are often those who seek a rational explanation for everything that happens to them. They can not break free of themselves and do not take what they want. You have to start, get out of the past, accept what has happened and stop thinking about it all the time. Go ahead: do not be afraid of life!
« Whenever you are tempted to react with the same old habits, ask yourself if you want to be a prisoner of the past or a pioneer of future is closed and limited, the future is open and free. » Deepak Chopra.
Let it go!
Stop trying to control everything. Stop, that’s enough. Really. STOP. By wanting to control everything in your life, you become unbalanced, unhappy and disappointed. Little by little, the feeling of being lost is growing and engulfing you. Trust in life and in its natural flow: it will happen what will happen. You will live what you need to experiment to be better than yesterday. Everything is lesson, everything is learning, and everything happens: sadness like joy … Enjoy the joy and keep hope even when everything goes wrong.
« I think everything happens for a reason. People change so you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you can enjoy them when they are better. You end up learning to trust no one but yourself.” Marilyn Monroe.
Now that you’ve learned about 10 secrets to being good with yourself, you no longer have any excuses for being uncomfortable with your person. I want to see you and you know how happy, fulfilled, and enjoy life !
See you soon,
Mary
